I feel my Pure Consciousness returning … and in more Ways than One - it means that my State of Happiness is returning!
I have this vivid memory - more than a memory - it is a moment that captures an Integral part of who I am. One that I feel committed to bringing to Life this year.
And that Integral part of who I am is - the Pure Consciousness that expresses ItSelf through me - how it has created such a unique and intimate experience of God within me.
And that memory - it is me standing at my bedroom window in Borde Narve a couple years ago.
And I am wearing one of those dresses that somehow becomes one of your comfort dresses - feeling the lightness; the beauty; the purity of who I am.
Wow … it’s been a while since I’ve used words like pure and purity in my writing.
And that girl is looking out Her Window and experiencing HerSelf; Her Life; the World and Its Existence through the Eyes of Her Pure Consciousness.
And if you had Eyes to SEE her Internal World - You would see that She was raised on the Love of the Heavens; in the Gardens of Heaven’s Paradise.
It is one of those things that was so natural to my experience that I never really acknowledged how unique and integral it is to who I am!
I never fully acknowledged till now - how much living in that Internal Pure Consciousness - impacts the Way that I experience and move through my Life.
I’d say about 3 years ago - I felt the Light of this Pure Consciousness switch off inside of me … something that was destined by my Soul … for I was to delve into more intricately and more intimately experiencing my human nature.
Just as I have that memory of looking out my bedroom window in my comfort dress experiencing the Light of who I am …
I also have that vivid memory of the Night - the Light switched off. I was sitting on the stairs outside my Home in the early morning hours … wearing that same dress.
I’ve written A LOT about the entire experience of the ‘lights being switched off’ over these past 2 years or so on this blog. I’d say initially I was deep in the darkness - imagine being in a fully lit House and suddenly all the lights were switched off. It’s a shock to your Eyes; to your body and it takes a while before your Eyes adjust. After my Eyes adjusted - I started walking around in the darkness; exploring it; experiencing it and I quickly saw that there was a freedom here that I never had prior. I was allow to feel things I never felt before; My mind was allowed to express all corners and recesses of itself; there were no rights or wrongs; it wasn’t about positivity over negativity or light over darkness. It was about allowing my being to roam freely without constricting itself.
Thereafter - I slowly started to realize that the lights were coming back on. But this felt A LOT more gracefull in that the House was NOT suddenly lit up again - because I gather that would have been a shock to my being … again - to go from standing in complete darkness to having the Scorching Sun shining on me. Instead - it was an extremely gentle experience.
And then there’s the wittiness of the Divine in all of this - while my experiences sound poetic at times; the experience itself can be quite poetic. I remember as the ‘lights were being switched back on’ - I went from finding complete comfort in the nights and in the darkness in my room to finding myself suddenly enjoying the Shade outside.
I’ve felt every moment of it - the moment each and every Light switched back on till now - where I felt my Pure Consciousness ‘reactivated’ within me. It may sound like I lost something and I had to find my way back to it and I guess in many ways that was the case. But it’s been more than that - it’s been a daily experience of my Soul intertwined with the Extraordinary It was experiecing my Pure Consciousness in a raw, intimate, human, grounded setting.
Experienced by - Chelsea Avasa Khan
